COVID garden creations. Dig it!

Chris May of Crestwood has seen an opportunity to get COVID creative: “I’ve been doing a bit of gardening and decided to remind myself that we’re getting out of lockdown by planting Aster and Zinnia in my rhubarb pot.”

“Like Neil Nicoll’s daughter (C8), I was also favoured by the cat,” says Maryan Glaister of Buderim. “When Mollie was as young as four months, she would regularly bring me beautifully coloured and shaped leaves and twigs and deposit them at my feet. On returning home on one occasion, I found in my kitchen a nearly full-size palm frond and, on another, a metre-long stick, both intact and brought up two flights of stairs and through two cat doors without damage. Sadly, she doesn’t do this as often now but, occasionally, I will receive a leaf in exchange for a tasty morsel.”

The concept of English budgies (C8) brought about a couple of noteworthy theories from readers. While Tony Prescott of Quorrobolong claims: “It’s obvious those English budgies for sale in Tuncurry were smuggled in.” Philip Maloney of Neutral Bay goes even further: “It’s possibly something to do with Tony Abbott’s influence with the British Board of Trade.”

Following Adela Parkes’ (C8) query on prolonging the life of cut flowers, the Column 8 inbox is blooming with advice. The first approach is pharmaceutic. Judith Rostron of Killarney Heights puts an aspirin into the vase “which someone once told me inhibits bacteria. Who knows?” It works, according to Susan Bradley of Eltham (Vic): “My bouquets have never complained of a headache.”

“Was Glasgow in November chosen for the Climate Change Conference by a climate denier?” asks Eric Scott of Bondi Junction. “I can just hear them saying: ‘Global warming? Aye, right.’”

This is the pits: “Requesting a small container of mixed olives at the Coles deli, the young lad informed me, ‘Sorry, we are not allowed to mix the olives.’ Is this taking social distancing a little too far?” wonders Judy Craig of Epping.

Kerry Kyriacou of Strathfield has a question for Gen Y: “We’ve all heard about ‘the road map to freedom’ but how many Millennials even know what a road map is? I keep an old UBD at work and, whenever I use it, I get funny looks from my younger colleagues who have never seen one. They probably use the GPS to get to the nearest shopping centre!”

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